UKAuthors - Leonardo Da Dog

I was looking at my dog, wondering what he'd be like if her were super intelligent, or even intelligent, and then I got to thinking...what if...

Leonardo Da Dog

Whether it was a fabulous coincidence or indeed, written in the stars, Leonardo’s name was completely appropriate for his character – as, like the Renaissance original, Leonardo was a genius and a fore leader in original thought. At the tender age of three months, he’d already realized a simple and effective way to rapidly reverse the effects of climate change through a carbon substitute comprised of natural chemicals found in dog poo.

The only trouble was, that Leonardo was a dog, and had no way of communicating his brilliant ideas to his owners who, although very sweet and loveable, possessed no vision other than curry and chips and bottles of brown ale on a Saturday night.

Leonardo gave a lot of thought and worry to his situation. He’d possessed the cure for cancer now for a month, and not being able to share such important information was weighing far too heavily. The realistic fear that he’d never find a way to communicate his knowledge to mankind had made him lose his appetite and he had started to moult.

Although she didn’t understand him, Mrs. Curry and Chips loved her dog dearly, and called for Mr. Curry and Chips. The pair then put their heads together and came up with the only course of action they believed was available to them.

Leonardo was shaken from his depression by a strange sterile environment and a long syringe.

…………………..

He awoke with a dry throat and a nasty pain between his hind legs. On closer investigation, Leonardo saw a small neat wound where he was sure two furry balls had been. But this problem was immediately forgotten on the discovery of something much more interesting…his tail! Leonardo, ecstatic with his discovery, chased his tail all afternoon, until he was distracted by a cat and chased that instead.

Mr. and Mrs. Curry and Chips smiled affectionately at their young dog as he chowed down his second bowl of Pedigree Chum, and scratched ineffectually at a bothersome flea.

Mrs. Curry and Chips felt reassured by her dog’s normal doggy behaviour, and decided that the castration had been the right thing to do. And as Leonardo, in simple ecstasy, fetched the same stick for the hundredth time, Mr. Curry and Chips just had to express his pride. “He be a right clever one that dog!” he said.

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